令人爆笑的童言无忌经典笑话
No Hoes 没有锄头A thirteen-year-old boy was sitting on the sofa watching TV when the phone rang.
“Hello, my son.” it was his father’s voice, “where is your mother?”
“Mother is working in the garden.”
“What?” barked the father, “Your mother is not as young and strong as she used to be. Why aren’t you helping her?”
“I can’t.” was the reply. “Grandma is using the other hoe.”
一个13岁的男孩正坐在沙发上看电视，这时电话响了。
“喂，儿子。”是父亲打来的。“你妈呢？”
“妈妈在院子里干活呢!”
“什么？”父亲吼道。“你妈已经不如从前那么强壮了。你这时怎么不在帮她？”
“不行啊！”儿子答道。“另一把锄头奶奶正在用呢！”
Is there a crib in your stomach? 肚子里有小床吗？
When my sister-in-low Leach was expecting her second child, her sonBrain would sometimes touch his mother’s tummy to feel the baby move.
One day, while touching her stomach and not feel anything, he asked, “How come the baby isn’t moving?”
“The baby is sleeping.” replied his mother.
Brain thought a moment and then said, “You mean you got a crib in there too?”
我丈夫的妹妹Leah怀着第二个孩子时，他的儿子Brain会时不时摸着她的肚子感觉婴儿的移动。
有一天，当Brain抚摸着妈大人您好肚子感觉不到什么时，问道：“为什么BB不动的？”
“它在睡觉呢！”他妈妈答道。
Brain想了一会后说：“你是说你肚子里面也有张床？”
Why is he crying? 他为什么哭泣？
“Tom, what’s the matter with your brother?” asked the mother in the kitchen. “He’s crying.”
“Oh, nothing, Mum” replied Tom. “I’m eating my cake. He is crying because I won’t give him any.”
“But has he finished his own cake?”
“Yes.” said Tom. “And he also cried when I was helping him finish that.”
“汤姆，你弟弟怎么了？”在厨房的妈妈问道。“他怎么在哭啊？”
“哦，没事儿，妈妈。”汤姆回答道。“我在吃我的蛋糕。因为我不给他，他就哭了。”
“那他吃完了自己那块了？”
“是的。”汤姆说。“我帮他吃蛋糕的时候就哭了。”
Saving a Dollar省下1美元
Johnny: Papa, would you be glad if I saved a dollar for you?
Papa: Naturally, my son.
Johnny: Well, I have saved one dollar for you. You said that if Ibrought a good mark this week, you would give me a dollar and I haven’tbrought one.
Johnny：爸爸，如果我为你省下1美元，你高兴不？
Papa：当然啦，孩子！
Johnny：那好，我省下1美元了。你说过我这个礼拜考出好成绩，就会给我1美元。我没考好！
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